Monday, April 23, 2007

I'm the King of the castle...and the rest of you are way down there

Romans 12 says " For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you."

As I'm surrendering the habit of complaining to the Lord, Romans 12 has hit me today like a ton of bricks.
I've realized that so much of the complaining I do stems from my perception of who I am...more bluntly, of who I think I am in comparison to everyone else.

The complaints in my head are only evidence to this: why can't I do that....when are Jeep and I going to be able to...How come everyone else can ...you get the picture. So, my point is this: A lot of my complaining comes from a position of pride in my heart.

I'll admit it: I think I'm better than a lot of other people. I think I'm more deserving than a lot of other people. I think I'm the greatest and therefore feel that everything in my life should reflect that.
Uh-oh, did I just say that out loud? I did. I'm ready to bear the reality of those words.
A lot of my complaining has consisted of comparing my life to someone else's life OR to the disgruntled revelation that no one will ask "How high?" when I say "Jump!"
I have allowed my heart to become full of pride. I have had a pattern of thinking of myself more highly than I ought. I have taken to thinking that I am better than any other human being and that I deserve certain things because I've known God for x number of years, etc.

So, how do I move forward from here. God doesn't leave me hanging...the second part of Romans 12: 3 says: but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you." What is sober judgement? Well, literally (dictionarily speaking) it means a sane and not too emotional opinion formed objectively, authoritatively and wisely especially in matters affecting action.
How can I judge myself? By the only standard of truth that there is--God's Word. And His word says that I am not think of myself more highly than I ought, and it also says that I should laugh with your happy friends when they're happy; share tears when they're down. Get along with each other; don't be stuck-up. Make friends with nobodies; don't be the great somebody.
Don't hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you've got it in you, get along with everybody. Don't insist on getting even; that's not for you to do. "I'll do the judging," says God. "I'll take care of it." (Romans 12:14-19 MSG)
It's not for me to judge others, but to judge myself.
Father,
Thank you for showing Your goodness to me and Your kindness to me today. You are wonderul and pure and completely confident in Yourself and Your ability.
I ask forgiveness for complaining about my life and more specifically thinking of myself more highly than I ought.I have been wrong. I have judged other's success and blessings as futile and stupid because in my heart I have been jealous that it wasn't me. You've displayed you kindness to others and I have chosen to find fault with You because of it. I am sorry, Lord. Please forgive me for my complaints. Lord, I choose today to laugh with my friends when they have success. And not to turn to You and ask You "why you haven't been faithful to me like You have been faithful to them." Instead, teach me Lord to ask, "How can I rejoice with them? Show me Your goodness in my life--remind me of Your faithfulness in the situation I am in now. Keep before my eyes the goodness of Your love towards me and keep me ever confident in the knowledge that You alone are worthy to be praised and that everyone, me included, will one day bow before the only King of Glory!
Amen

The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us, not by what we are and what we do for him. Romans 12:3 (MSG)

3 comments:

Cheryl said...

Fabulous post. I love your real heart!!! You echo the thoughts of women everywhere. What you are struggling with is what is real to all women. Or at least this woman.

Thanks for the honesty and truth that He showed you. It blessed my heart and set me into thinking more of Him.

Proud of you!

Tamatha said...

hhhmmmm.....kewl post. I love your transparency...and wish I could hug you! Someday God will bring our paths to cross again.:o)

Amy said...

Great Holly!!
So admire your honesty....most of us can definately relate to this post..thank you for being bold enough to write it.
God bless!!!!!!!